Do YOU love it?

I've been doing this blog thing for one year now on and off and during this time I got about 5000 hits (which is a lot since I didn't blog regularly). So now I want to hear from you for once! Do you love what I put on my blog or not? Do you want more videos? More pics?

Gimme some love :)

M.

The Miracle on the 29th street

Not so long ago relationships and hook-ups were determined by the place you live in and the people around you. There weren’t things as internet, manhunt/romeo sites, disposable cell phones and the life in “this” world was not that easy. Meeting someone was very hard. Maintaining a relationship in secrecy was very hard. But today it’s normal that two guys living in different cities spend Christmases across the globe stay in contact in a loving relationship. 

Being alone on Christmas is hard. But the sole concept of being with someone has changed so drastically that if we really have someone we are never alone. Maybe older generations think that there is no intimacy in emails, but I can’t even describe how happy I feel to share the thoughts with my boyfriend and imagine what situation he’s in. It really is the next best thing to being physically with him.

Meeting places have changed, traditions have modernized, the way we communicate is different but the people are the same and the holiday spirit will always be the same regardless the way we spread it.

Merry Christmas everyone! :)

all I want for Christmas.*.

it's that special time of year again... :) this past few weeks have been amazing. each day I am falling in love more and more with my bf <3

baby, all I want for Christmas is you... I'll be waiting :)

merry Christmas everyone!

the first one

I've finally found someone I can connect with on all levels... I'm so happy :D 

He is my first boyfriend and I feel really blessed to be able to say that! Life is good! :)

 

express yourself / don't repress yourself

I made this video playlist at myflashfetish.com

And I'm not sorry (I'm not sorry)
It's human nature (it's human nature)
And I'm not sorry (I'm not sorry)
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit
on me (it's human nature)

You wouldn't let me say the words I longed to say
You didn't want to see life through my eyes
(Express yourself, don't repress yourself)
You tried to shove me back
inside your narrow room
And silence me with bitterness and lies
(Express yourself, don't repress yourself)

Did I say something wrong?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
(I musta been crazy)
Did I stay too long?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't speak my mind
(What was I thinking)


You punished me for telling you my fantasies
I'm breakin' all the rules I didn't make
(Express yourself, don't repress yourself)
You took my words and made a trap for silly fools
You held me down and tried to make me break
(Express yourself, don't repress yourself)


Did I say something true?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
(I musta been crazy)
Did I have a point of view?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about you
(What was I thinking)

Express yourself, don't repress
yourself [repeat twice]
Express yourself, don't repress
yourself [repeat twice]


(I'm not apologizing)
(Would it sound better if I were a man?)
(You're the one with the problem)
(Why don't you just deal with it)

(Would you like me better if I was?)
(We all feel the same way)
(I have no regrets)
(Just look in the mirror)

(I don't have to justify anything)
(I'm just like you)
(Why should I be?)
(Deal with it)

serenade

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

thinking about a guy I met online a couple of days ago that's really far away :(

the dating season

well this year is definitley gonna be something different. I've never been on a date with a guy (just sexdates and I don't consider that a date as we have never even had some coffee before). in a couple of weeks I am going on my first date... yay! of course I meet the people online, but still I really look forward to something more fufilling than just sex. 



movies mean a lot to me and I've just recently realised I've never even watched any gay themed movie... it helps to see these situations to encourage actually doing it. the first movie I watched and absolutley loved was The Shelter, second that was aslo great was Boy Culture, and last night I watched this comedy A Four Letter Word and it wasn't so touching as the first two but still it has a certain message.



the point is I am growing in a gay sense. I realised that I want something more than just sex and that's just wonderful... now I just need to find someone that wants it with me ;)

the martin twins

as you've probably heard ricky martin had twins with a surogat mother and plans to stop working for a year to take care of them. I think it's really sweet and his sexuality is not important here. of course everyone thinks he's gay but in the end it really is his private thing and it's probably not just his decision to stay closeted if this is true. can you imagine the machinery behind such a famous singer?

and just look at this picture - they look so happy together! how can society be so cruel to judge love and happines?



and can we really blame him for spending time with this major hottie??

you know what would maybe be a perfect scenario for me one day? to have 2 kids by a beautiful surogat mother - one with my semen and other one with my partners...
that way they would be half-brothers and each would have his own biological child :)
I know that I'm just dreaming now but still... it would be nice ;)

the lazy summer that's about to go away

I just love it when I spend whole summer practically doing nothing. just being lazy. it's crazy how the whole two months of summer just pass away like nothing. and in the beginning it's weird how you're gonna have to change your habits once again but still there is something special about going back to college each fall. first there is the student lifestyle. then there are your old friends reunited. then there are your old fuck buddies. then you have new freshmen you're gonna meet...



of course every year you hope there could be that special someone. but even if it's not you still get to meet great people that broaden your horizonts and in the end that's what college is all about.





I guess it's just a point of view... but if you ask me the glass is always half full! :)



The first picture is from Men Magazine and the rest of them are from Major Model.

the boyfriend to be

These past couple of days I've been on the beach constantly... I just love it how relaxing it is to sunbathe still soaked in water while the mild breeze is calmly touching your skin. The only problem is there are so many hot guys to look at... Being in the closet and living in a country that's not gay-friendly makes u constantly monitor yourself. a) you don't want somebody to notice you're checking a guy out b) you don't want the guy to notice you're checking him out cuz in the worst case it can get ugly. I constantly try to imagine how would it be to live in a world where this is 100% accepted. You see a guy, check him out, he sees it, checks you out, you meet up and go out for a drink!

I am currently searching for a boyfriend. I really need somebody to love emotionally and sexually. I am sure I will find that special someone, it may just take some time. Somebody to laugh with, somebody that attracts me physicaly, somebody that will be my best friend, somebody to look deeply at his eyes for no apparent reason when I wake up besides him, somebody to have wild sex with, somebody to comfort when he's sad, somebody to go out for an ice-cream with...

Somebody to help me do the laundry...




Somebody to share a book with and have great conversations about it afterwards...



Somebody that loves dogs and wants to have one...



Somebody that loves me for just being me.



All the pictures are from Major Model.

the fantasy

you know how there is always something you desire to do next sexually...
first thing I wanted to try on my freshman year was fucking a guy.
needless to say it went on and on & afterwards even some toys were included.
as sophmore year came, cumming on someone's face and slight tie games became a reality.
on my junior year I did my first threeway. and a younger guy. and an older guy.

but last couple of months I started thinking about one thing I wanted to try in bed - sleep over. yeah that's my next wild fantasy - wake up hugging someone I might actually like. I think I'm ready for something more serious. I want to have a boyfriend for the first time. but the thing is I still don't even consider coming out under there circumstances I'm in. so - how can a straight pretending guy actually meet another guy that he likes not just for sex but also as a friend?

EDIT: This article from Out Magazine says exactly what I've been saying...

I don’t wanna be

We live in a world filled with various stereotypes. Some of them start at birth.
While parents patiently await for the doctor to tell them the sex of their future child they may say that it doesn't matter but actually it does. Most of them hope for a boy. An heir that will be the one to lead on the family name. But little do they know the boy they are going to parent may just turn out to love boys a bit more passionately than girls.

I kinda feel trapped in this world of mine... working every day to make a perfect image of something I am not. It's hard when you see some of your foregin friends approaching guys in bars, looking deeply at their boyfriend's eyes in public, checking out that cute guy's butt without being afraid that somebody might not like what they are doing. And all I actually want is just that - freedom to be who I am.

Will I have leave my country (that I love besides that) to be free? I don't know. But living like this my whole life is just not an option.

"I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately
All I have to do is think of me and I've peace of mind
I'm tired of looking 'round rooms wondering what I gotta to do
Or who I'm supposed to be
I don't want to be anything other than me"